Hello very attractive and well dressed patron who only comes in twice a summer. How have you been? Did you notice my look of surprise when you walked in?
We have already gone over the fact that Theatre by the Sea isn’t exactly the best place to pick up the eligible bachelors, so why do you insist on dangling your smashing good looks over your questionable sexuality. Old men and homosexuals are the regulars here so my only saviors are the Meterosexuals; a small glimmer of hope that they might be straight. A metrosexual is loosely defined as a man living in a post industrial, capitalist culture who has a strong concern for his appearances or lifestyle which is typically associated with the homosexual male, although he is heterosexual.
You walk in here with your neatly groomed face, plucked eyebrows, gelled hair, chiseled chest and whitened teeth just to make me swoon. You are a rare urban, sophisticated man who is fashionable and well-groomed…please be straight, never mind single!
“You would like the best seat in the house to see our drag queen host cabaret at a musical theatre?” Ok I get it, I have no hope. Back to the drawing board.
xoxo
Hoping for better luck next time,
Erica
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